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July 31, 2004
Not on
Mmmm. Not on. Endelmol in the last week has whittled down the housemates to the 5 likable (or depending on your personal opinion the least obnoxious) and now they think it's great TV to make them all physically sick for the entertainment of us jaded masses.
by groc at 09:49 PM | Comments (3)
mmm
want one via gizmodo.
by groc at 12:09 PM | Comments (0)
woo yay
this morning I got my first front page on B3ta. That's special that is. (Link to individual post if it suddenly vanishes.)
Incidently if you arrived at this blog from B3ta - check out the spam monsters.
by groc at 10:25 AM | Comments (1)
July 30, 2004
if...
...you haven't heard this already -then you MUST. It's brilliant.
by groc at 02:28 PM | Comments (1)
the chicken-eating spider
an endangered species (hopefully).
by groc at 01:24 PM | Comments (3)
sheeps
brighter than you'd suppose. be afraid.
by groc at 09:50 AM | Comments (2)
transcript
Transcript from Uncut Diary Room footage that won’t ever be broadcast.
It’s very early in the morning.
Stuart ambles into the diary room. Unlike his usual laid back surfer/hippy-like state he’s looking unusually anxious and haunted.
“Er…. Big Bro?”
“Yes Stuart.”
Stuart pauses and distractively bites at his fingernails.
“Er…. Oh man. Er…”
“Is something troubling you Stuart?”
“Yeah. Look. Um. Man. If like Michelle gets like…. Er…. evicted tonight. Like.”
Long pause.
“Yes Stuart?”
“Is it possible that on my own er…. eviction night. That -er, Big Brother can arrange to have my passport, er, a packed suitcase, a taxi to Heathrow, and a flight to [sound of bird song, a cat purring, and a pig oinking] ready for me?”
“Yes Stuart - Big Brother can assure you that it’s own version of the ‘witness protection programme’ is at your disposal. Arrangement for your family and friends to be relocated and their identities changed will start immediately.”
Stuart -suddenly brightening. “Oh wow. Cool Big Brother. You‘re the greatest.”
“Big Brother is glad to be of help Stuart. You may now leave the diary room.”
Later during breakfast Michelle is seen sharpening the steak knives… is heard muttering “if I can’t havvim, no one’s havvinim.”
by groc at 07:39 AM | Comments (0)
July 29, 2004
Miscellaneous links
Freeload -download midi tunes to your mobile phone -for free. Catch: you've got to source your own midi files first -but that's not difficult. Not when quite a few of those mobile phone sites put up midi samples of the tunes you can get from them...
Mmmmm, sounds a bit Donnie Darko, a bit Tru Calling? (which is too boring to watch), and another flm I can't remember right now. Ashton Kutcher -drool slaver.
Image Shack. Free image hosting.
Robots in Disguise. (they were 'Kraftwerk Orange' from the mighty Boosh.
Orgazmo (great film from those chaps that make Southpark)
Preparing for emergancies. 'Cause like, we've had ssssoooo many terrorist attacks on our country lately.
Excellent b3ta big brother riff.
(Question: why are there so many people around who feel the need to tell everyone how they don't watch BB and by implication how superior they are because of it?)
by groc at 11:41 AM | Comments (3)
trilby & eyeliner
The offical BB website mentions Dan's trilby and eyeliner look.
Ahem.
Where've I seen that before?
Thankfully the brown lipstick error wasn't also taken onboard.
by groc at 10:37 AM | Comments (3)
July 28, 2004
oh wise one
by groc at 02:22 PM | Comments (0)
July 27, 2004
freebies
cutting edge microsoft downloads. Any good to anybody?
by groc at 07:43 PM | Comments (4)
Shell
by groc at 01:02 AM | Comments (1)
July 26, 2004
revolutionary
by groc at 07:49 PM | Comments (1)
groc gets a mention
on the Register webite in an article on Spam poetry. Yay me.
by groc at 05:53 AM | Comments (0)
RUN chicken!
by groc at 03:09 AM | Comments (5)
July 25, 2004
Charmer
Victor on tonight’s BBLB: “[…Shell] is a complete waste of space, she‘s got as much personality as a used condom.”
Lovely man, such the charmer.
You know that classic 1958s film 'the Fly'
-remember the infamous last scene?
I keep seeing it over and over...
by groc at 08:17 PM | Comments (3)
baby clothes
I can't stand human babies myself - but people will insist on popping them out, so they may at least make the horrible creatures entertaining...
But to humiliate animals? -Not on.
by groc at 07:24 PM | Comments (2)
starling
one of a pair which was excitedly jumping around pecking at a ants nest, on a busy street unperturbed by humans passing close by.
by groc at 05:50 PM | Comments (0)
need glasses
special red green 3d glasses - I've stacks of them somewhere. But can I find a pair now i need them?
by groc at 04:05 AM | Comments (4)
go home
You know that car insurance advert with the nodding animated bulldog that's voiced by Vic Reeves, you know the particular one in the series where there's an alien invasion in it and where the streets are packed full of little green men? You know the very end of it - where the bulldog says 'Go home' to the alien, and the alien says in it's little high pitched voice 'no'. Remember it? Now imagine the alien's head replaced with Jason's face.
Go home Jason. Just go into the diary room and demand to go home. No one wants you there, not after you separated yourself off to be with Vicky-boy, you don't want to be there, you hate everyone and everyone hates you right back, you know you aren't going to win. You're bored out of your skull and you're boring to watch. Stop torturing yourself. Go home. All those chicks are waiting for you -remember. *cough*.
by groc at 01:30 AM | Comments (3)
July 24, 2004
J
Jason is alone in the Pamper Room. Again. He stares at his feet as he contemplates his future, he misses his best buddy Victor - he loved sharing his witty banter, he even misses his smelly hat, his stinky pyjama bottoms, his wobbly bitch-tits. Oh, how could it have gone so wrong so soon? Their intricately crafted game plan. He was so sure the public loved them. Their double act, their witty repartee, those clever put downs and sharp character assassinations of the other house members. Oh, it was so funny when Victor managed to make Shell cry. He was so “da man“, that Mr. Slick. How could the public have voted him out? He and himself where the only ones telling it like it is. The sound of Nadia’s laughter distracts him for a moment - setting his teeth on edge. That hideous laugh. Victor would have said something witty just then to help it be a little less grating.
Oh well, must try to look on the bright side - he’s still sure people are mesmerised by his bronzed muscular body and his delicious firm buttocks, oh he can‘t wait for tonight when the rest of them have gone to bed and he can do his work out and elaborate painstaking ablutions in peace and quiet. He mustn’t let things slip. He can already feel a lot of definition going. But the chicks will be lining up for him once he leaves the house. Oh yeah.
He feels so very, very sad but he knows he mustn’t cry. Big boys don’t cry, they run, they work out, they lie around on beds all day setting the world to rights by the power of mean-spirited bitching, but they do not ever cry. Ever… Oh Vicky boy…
by groc at 01:18 PM | Comments (1)
July 23, 2004
thank you
thank you great British public. You did the right thing...
we're left with 3 very strange men now -a girly boy, a vanity case and a gayer... and an ex-man too, it's all so new millennium.
by groc at 09:39 PM | Comments (6)
new seagull pikturs
by groc at 02:10 AM | Comments (0)
Oh goody,
Let's hope enough people saw Victor's extremely boorish arsey behaviour on tonight's Big Brother to vote to evict him out of the house tomorrow. Quite why he was even allowed to stay after the infamous 'Fight night' after brandishing a (butter) knife around is anyone's guess, to me he's long been living on borrowed time.
Mardy over being nominated and spoiling for a fight he couldn't go against his bosom buddy Jason, he couldn't pick on Michelle if he wanted to keep Stuart on side, he daren't go against Dan who could run verbal rings around him and even flatten him if it came to it, for some unknown reason he didn't go for Nadia -so he went all out to upset Shell. Innocuous, conflict-shy Shell. Um. Such the big (arse) slick gangsta he. That's the second woman he's chosen to go up against. The complete twunt.
He still hasn't twigged that BB is a popularity contest and if he really thinks a loveable rogue can win... then the first stage might possibly be to be er.... loveable.
(I do hope someone is out there writing a paper on BB5 as a case study on the crisis of masculinity and gender roles in the new millennium. It's all there.)
by groc at 12:44 AM | Comments (1)
July 21, 2004
innit
by groc at 07:51 PM | Comments (1)
la la la
by groc at 06:56 PM | Comments (0)
July 20, 2004
evict the bum
My first choice to go would be Victor butt
by groc at 10:27 PM | Comments (1)
decluttering again
"I'm decluttering again. Does anyone want an owl trivet? It's rather ugly.
Or a King Penguin on seagulls? Its spine is gone..."
by groc at 07:47 PM | Comments (1)
July 19, 2004
snooty
by groc at 05:58 AM | Comments (0)
note to self
that there gorgeous-looking camera that's being held by Gwyneth Paltrow in the Sky Captain poster looks very similiar to an Argus C-3. I think I want one.
Groc loves cameras.
Incidently, trust Microsoft to cack up what could otherwise be a great idea... DRM sucks and it's stifling emerging technology -not to mention potential new markets. Stupid entertainment industry.
But then again Bill Ryan likes it -lots.
all via Player blog.
by groc at 03:34 AM | Comments (0)
July 18, 2004
iDon't get it
Across the bloggosphere there’s suddenly a strong whiff of wet panties and creamed jeans. Yes, I cheerfully admit I know I wouldn’t say no to one and indeed, would be very happy if someone ever gave me one as gift (although given the price of them there’s fat chance of that) but I just don’t get the cultish slavering appeal of the iPod. I can’t help thinking people are confusing their passionate love of their own personal record collection with the gadget itself. I mean look at it - it’s white* Eurgh - (I so hate white, it‘s only one step up from beige) -apart from the oh-so-easily scratched chrome back and it’s only got a bw screen, and those white ear buds -ick. It’s tacky people, can‘t you see that? And I wonder if there’s still the issues with the battery life where after it stops taking a recharge after 18 months or so -will you still have to send it back to Apple to get them to put in a new battery or -are you supposed to just go out buy a new iPod… Apple are sure to love you for that. Ker-ching.
*Yes I know the mini pods come in different colours -and it’s a good job they do. But why can’t the bigger pods come in different colours as well?
by groc at 10:11 PM | Comments (0)
love and marriage
Mmmm of course I think the happily wedded couple should be Jason and Victor. But I suppose they'll go for the tediously obvious...
by groc at 01:16 PM | Comments (0)
it must be love love love
Forget the creepy-scary non "affair" between Bunny-boiler Michelle and sleep-walking Stuart*, the real full-on romance is happening between Victor and Jason. Who knew that such insecure narcissists could ever find such strong mutual admiration outside of their respective mirrors? They’ve already been talking about paying visits to each other outside of the House, it can’t be long before they end up sharing a flat together… Jason will be on hand to shave Victor every morning… aw bless, (and do whatever else Victor is too lazy to do for himself -*cough* like wanking *cough*). Except of course it's all bound to end in some kind of hideous Orton & Halliwell style gruesomeness a few years down the line.
(It's late: I've been watching them indulging in yet another one of their usual late night 'discussions' (bitchfest) of the other housemates and scheming away, but other than that what else do they do? Victor slobs around all day in his (what by now must be throughly stinking) hat and grotesque baggy boxer shorts, and Jay when he's not hiding out alone in the pampering room, spends hours and hours grooming and admiring himself in the bathroom mirrors. They think this a winning strategy for themselves do they? Hum. The poor sad deluded bastards.)
*On flicking through channels recently I accidentally happened upon an advert for a street hypnotist show -showing some poor hapless young man in the street running around pretending to do various weird things, and I instantly thought omigod! That’s exactly how BB5 Stuart behaves. He's in a deep hypnotic trance! It's obvious now. Although we're yet to have the pleasure of seeing chicken Stu out of the House where upon he'll suddenly snap to wakeful consciousness and run screaming as fast and as hard as he can to get away from that woman's clutches.
by groc at 02:14 AM | Comments (1)
July 17, 2004
Retro-futuro
For some reason the forthcoming movie (although god knows when -or even if, it will ever reach the UK) "Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow" suddenly reminded of the rather obscure but rather wonderful 1984 fantasy movie "Nothing Lasts Forever". Who saw that?* It was on telly a couple of times. It featured a bus trip to the moon, and the revelation that the world was run by a secret underground society who were tramps and hobos in the overground world... or something like that.
Mmmm, I wonder if anyone will make a proper retro-futuro version of Dan Dare? (I know there's a cgi animation TV series -but it's quite awful.)
*I bet Zbornak knows about this since it starred Zach Galligan who also starred in Gremlins I & II
by groc at 08:58 PM | Comments (3)
July 16, 2004
Phew
By the by, have Victor, Jason and Daniel been the only ones who haven't been in floods of tears yet? Proof they ain't human.
by groc at 09:53 PM | Comments (0)
evict
Sorry, call me old fashioned but I just don't find weird creepy sexist homophobic near-psychopathic cranky middle aged men particularly entertaining.
Evict - the tooth of Ahmed compels you!
by groc at 08:01 PM | Comments (5)
photo Friday - ocean
There's not much point of taking a photo of the ocean today - since it's a rather depressing gray. So much for summer this year. But only a few days ago -after a few days of really nasty storms it looked like this...
by groc at 11:48 AM | Comments (4)
July 15, 2004
nostalgia
Mmmm, the interglobalinterwebnet seems a bit sparce when it comes to information about one of my dimly but fondly remembered comic book strips -Puss 'n' Boots in the Sparky comic. Which featured such incidental delights as Policemen sporting flashing blue lights on their helmets, the pogo-stick as a form of transport, it was altogether a lot more 'Monty Python-ish' and 'The Goodies' influenced than most of the old-fashioned fare at the time. I was hoping for a few scanned pages or something out there. I particularly wanted to know who the artist/writer was. But alas. Why don't we know who he (or she) was and why are they not being honoured as a comedy genius?
I'm sure I've got the odd annual - (issues 73 through to 77) currently rotting away in the sea air in the garage. Deep heavy sigh.
Mind you I never really liked Annuals -even as a kid I thought they were a bit of a rippoff compared to the weekly comics.
by groc at 02:44 AM | Comments (1)
July 14, 2004
txt msg
to Mathpunk - "Watch Freezer on the Sci-fi channel. It's full of good ideas on what to do with some of those more troublesome gaydar dates..."
But he never replied, maybe he's now sharing space with a frozen leg of lamb?
by groc at 11:41 PM | Comments (7)
promotion
think gramatically from a dedicated im-mac user to boot.
by groc at 09:11 PM | Comments (0)
Want one
but as I'm already having a long wait until the price of mpg-players comes down to a level where a pauper like me can afford one - I expect an even longer wait until I'll ever be able to afford one of these babies...
But again they can stuff any idea of DRM. Jeez, what is wrong with these people?
by groc at 01:48 AM | Comments (0)
July 13, 2004
lomo summer
I dusted off my lomo lc-a and took it out for a little walk...
by groc at 10:35 PM | Comments (4)
Prince Alarming
Here is Poly Toynbee managing to sum up quite a few things I've been thinking myself about Prince Charles over the years.
by groc at 05:14 PM | Comments (0)
July 12, 2004
and to think
only the other day I was wondering if anyone even did homepages any more...
by groc at 10:50 AM | Comments (1)
Dr Who
Some old photos from a Dr Who exhibition the bf and I went to in St. Albans a couple of years (or so) ago.
by groc at 02:54 AM | Comments (3)
July 11, 2004
I want one.
.
by groc at 07:31 PM | Comments (4)
baby seagull watch
Mmmmm. Who'd be up for seeing a 6 meg quick time movie of a young seagull practising using their wings for the first time ever? Or a movie of two adult seagulls having a right good scrap?
Just me then? Darn.
by groc at 03:28 PM | Comments (2)
July 10, 2004
my
by groc at 11:16 PM | Comments (1)
July 09, 2004
picky
apparently things are running close - who goes? you decide...
In the other place. Huh? But Ahmed -psychotic incidents and icky weird creepiness aside was the boring one. Why vote Becki out? Makes me think my suspicions that she was a plant was right all along.
by groc at 09:44 PM | Comments (1)
Found Photos
Is this Mr. Gazza Numan? He does look a bit rough. And this is definitely Laurie and Lou!
From the excellent FoundPhotos via LDMA.
by groc at 04:32 PM | Comments (1)
Yesterday
All Stormy all day long and then -another rainbow.
Just curious -who's using a bloglines account thingamijig to keep track of my humble little site then? Is bloglines any good? Better than kinja?
by groc at 11:42 AM | Comments (6)
July 08, 2004
who lives in a pineapple...
My little spongebobs
by groc at 01:25 PM | Comments (2)
July 07, 2004
format wars
After reading this article I think I'll be sticking to my mpg-playing CD player (that only cost £40) for a while longer yet. They can all stick their various DRM systems where the sun don't shine. So ner.
by groc at 10:41 AM | Comments (1)
Bzzzzz
by groc at 09:53 AM | Comments (0)
July 06, 2004
dance
Mr Morrissey -dance for us all.
by groc at 09:38 PM | Comments (1)
baby seagull watch
by groc at 09:28 PM | Comments (0)
Mmmm, ok
So why is my browser of choice (Firefox) suddenly refusing to show any blogspot pages whatsoever? Instead I'm getting a totally blank html page. It was bad enough that before it often took a refresh to display a blogspot page properly - on the first load it would only render the top of a page and then dissolve into the most interesting looking garbage. Weird.
by groc at 06:32 PM | Comments (3)
LOMO symbol
I've got two of these cameras bought from local charity shops, each for about a £5 (one's got English lettering, the other Russian). They're OK as basic cameras go, but I agree with Rain -there's no way they're worth the US$75 the Lomo shop are asking for them. The LOMOgraphic people are taking the piss.
Not that I wouldn't say no to a colour splash or a frogeye camera... but not at those prices.
by groc at 01:22 PM | Comments (0)
July 05, 2004
Sunday walk
I went for a walk this Sunday - here are few of the things i saw.
by groc at 09:27 PM | Comments (1)
venting
Well, I'm pleased to report that my BT Yahoo spam filters are finally working a lot better than they used to. (Which is just as well since they won't let me delete that particular sub-account!) But I am flabberghasted that that one particular porn site spammer which has been causing me so much grief has sent 83 near identical spams for their Hoottt Liiivveee Teeens on caaam (sic) overnight -because yeah, that will so make me want to go and spend money at their shitty porn site. Won't it???? and to think I used to get upset when they sent me just 10 spams a day for that stupid Hilton Paris video. (Which I've since seen out of morbid curiosity (not from any of those porn sites I hasten to add!) -and was totally unimpressed by. But then creepy night vision hetero porn isn't my thing.)
Talking of being unimpressed -the trailer for the new live action Thunderbirds movie has just been on TV. What a great steaming pile of crap that looks to be. Way to go to totally ruin a classic, Hollywood.
Update: I've just received another 22 near identical spams!
Later: 5:30pm and another 15 have arrived!
Later still: 5 minutes before midnight another 15...
by groc at 08:50 AM | Comments (7)
July 04, 2004
rainbow
Outside my window not 10 minutes ago. Click it for pop up biggerness.
by groc at 08:18 PM | Comments (2)
I want...
You know those post-it note programs that let you leave virtual sticky notes on your desktop and unfortunately ONLY on your desktop? Well I want someone to write something similar that shows inside directories/folders actually it should to be an intregral part of the OS -not something that's a separate program. I’m always wanting to be able to leave quick little general notes for myself on stuff -like what the files are and what they’re for, and reminders on what I need/want to do with them etc. and I want to be able to have those notes readily and instantly accessible. Yeah, I know you could have a manky old text file but that’s not what I want -’cause that’s just crap that is. I don’t want to have to launch notepad or wordpad when I want to quickly read something.
Also, while I'm in the vague vincinity of the subject ... with my Handspring Visor/palm pilot thing it's always bugged me that you can't list addresses by first name first. Well. not without cheating like I've had to -by putting both names on the one line. Which is crap. I wonder if they've changed that in later models? (I'm starting to have gadget lust for a new one with a colour screen...)
by groc at 02:29 PM | Comments (0)
She's back
Yay. Let's hope she can stay troll-free this time.
by groc at 01:34 PM | Comments (0)
I liked that there
'I'm free! Inside the comedy closet' program wot woz on Channel 4 tonite. BBC 4 also had a good documentary on what life was like for Gay folk during the 1960s a couple of weeks ago.
by groc at 12:01 AM | Comments (2)
July 03, 2004
Conscience pricker.
 | Well, I'm still waiting for my forgetful bf to do something about getting over to me all my digital photos from the San Francisco trip. Tsk-tsk. They were on his laptop and I got all excited when one weekend he'd actually remembered to bring it down with him. Of course he'd forgotten -for some reason he'd transferred all of them to his work computer. Where they're currently 'Doing a fat lot of good'™ D'oh.
(Oddly enough at the same time he can't understand why on Earth I should want one of those portable gadgets that store digital data -photos, mpgs, movies etc. Hum.) Do you think I'll ever see them again before he leaves his old job? I'm beginning to wonder... |
by groc at 01:25 PM | Comments (3)
July 02, 2004
Busting the
by groc at 02:19 PM | Comments (4)
Leg it
by groc at 11:45 AM | Comments (3)
Tiffany
From: "Tiffany Ortega" smwxdm@tvcatalunya.com
To: "Grobb"
Subject: align
Date: Fri, 02 Jul 2004 07:00:12 +0600
transfer,and im wasting,transfer,and im wasting,transfer,and im wasting.transfer,and im wasting,transfer,and im wasting.
by groc at 11:42 AM | Comments (0)
toys!
timbiskup (via the cartoonist.)
by groc at 05:55 AM | Comments (0)
July 01, 2004
115 and a crow
by groc at 03:00 PM | Comments (0)
arty
by groc at 08:44 AM | Comments (1)